Wednesday, August 28, 2013

"I Running Away!"

It took until the 6th child to finally hear this....

We are having a nice afternoon at home, Madeline in school, John David home sick. I ask Janie if she would like to swim for a bit...."Yay" she says.....I tell her to go get her bathing suit in the laundry room....she proceeds to say "no you get it" to which I oblige and hand it to her. She drops it and follows me to the kitchen. I tell her once again to go get her suit on....once again she says "no you get it". Well being the smart Mom that I am, I say what I should have said the first time "nope, you go and get it, plus I don't think I have heard a please". Let me just say that did not go over very well lol! She finally decided that I was not going to get  her suit again and did put it on. I thought all was well in the world again......Nope again!

She comes around the corner, in her suit, and says "I running away since you didn't get my suit". My response I think was somewhat like "good luck with that girlfriend".......her response.....she walks right out that door....and slams it I might add! Oh my I am dying laughing at this point and yell up to John David what is going on.....he yells back "Mom, go follow her cause she is the kind of girl who will follow through with it!"Too funny!!

I follow her out and sit on the steps watching her. She STOMPS down that driveway! I sit and wait to see how far she will go....she disappears around the corner by our mailbox.....

Disclaimer: we live at the very end of a dead end so don't send me hate messages:)

I sneak through the front yard to our neighbors so I can see the street, all the while wondering what she will do.....still laughing though! I watch and watch and she does not appear ( I am hiding behind a tree....I know, I need to grow up and get a life). I look back to the driveway and she is SLOWLY walking back down it and spots me. She turns right back around! Oh my word she is such a mess!! Finally she just sits down in the middle of the driveway, you know.... all dejected and disappointed with her grand plan. I sit next to her and she will not speak to me for 10 full minutes, pretty hard core if you ask me! Finally she looks at me and says "can we swim now?" "Sure Janie" I tell her. She grabs my hand and all is well in the world again. A day in the life of Janie Jane.....

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Everyday Life

                                          Sara and Dottie got to meet up with Julianne in Chicago on their trip back Tennessee.

      Janie has refused to help buckle herself into her car day I said "we are going to have a party when you start helping buckle yourself".....well she buckled herself one day and declared that she was going to "have a Mellow Mushroom party":). Of course we obliged on Friday evening!

After Mellow I headed downtown with Gardner and Kendyl to attend the RAW art exhibit that Allie was asked to participate in. She sold many of her prints! It was really a cool exhibit, we are so proud of all her hard work.....and it is really hard to believe this talented adult is my child!

                                               and she still writes important info on her hand!

                                        there was also live art:)

while we were at the exhibit Hank to John David and the girls frogging!
This totally cracks me up, dressed in their Matilda Jane and frogging haha!

I forgot to add these pics last week....Janie discovered that she and Chris have the same shoes,
this girl can pose!

                                               too funny!!

And I cannot believe I have not posted a pic of my sweet niece Zoe waiting for her Mommy and Daddy in China!! They just received USCIS approval and should get that dossier to China in the next few weeks so they can officially be waiting on their LOA. We are hoping they get to travel to get her in February or March!!!

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

This Adorable Child....

that smile pretty much sums her up.....
most days of her life...
yes, she can be a total whiner at times,
but I get it....
most of the total whiny times have to do when she feels somewhat out of control,
Hank will tell you that is true of me too....
so...I get it....and her!

Her story is more than I can totally share,
I have yet  ~and maybe never will~  share it with her
God will decide that for her.....and me

My thoughts these days...
~now that I can actually have a thought without being interrupted oh 456 times~
are on how far my Janie has come in a year...
this time last year she was about to undergo her first surgery
with 2 more to come throughout the next few months...
she was in diapers
her health uncertain
preschool on hold
she was happy 
and pretty much has been since she came home...
she did not know life any other way...

As I look back over this past year I realize how much I take for granted..
in the day to day...stuff
I forget that she moved on to underwear
I forget that she goes about her days clean from all the poo
I forget that I don't have to worry about catheterizing 
I forget what could have been....
but God does not..
He knows what He spared her and us from
He knows how many times He has intervened on her and our behalf
He knows what I should be thankful for
He knows what I forget to notice in the busyness of the days
He loves us
He knows we love this gift He has bestowed upon our family
this precious smiley girl that she is.
Oh Janie Jane we love you so.......

Matthew 10:29-3029"Are not two sparrows sold for a cent? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. 30"But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31"So do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows.

"reading" her bible to her Hello Kitty
those cheeks....seriously I will miss those so!

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Happy Birthday JuJu ~LATE!

My original baby turned 22 on the 15th! We were lucky that she got to come home for the weekend, for her birthday and for a friend's bridal shower. We celebrated for lunch on Sunday before she had to catch her flight back and of course I did not get many pics.......but that will change soon when I start playing with my camera again with the extra time I will have with kids in school:)~ by the way I feel like a new person with 2 days playing catch up.....even cooked 2 nights in a row whooo hoooo!

Moooooom, stop taking my picture!

Happy birthday sweet Julianne
we can't wait for you to come home next month!!!

crack me up....

oh this her so!

Another fun thing I get to do with kids in school is catch up with my bigs!!
I finally went downtown to file for Janie's social security card (yes a year later)
and met up with Allie for lunch!!!
I scare myself.....
and I'm really just over all the wrinkles...
there is not enough filler for all those haha!

Tomorrow I'll post about our sweet Janie and the difference a year makes.....

Saturday, August 17, 2013

First Day of Ballet!

One thing Janie has talked about for a LONG time is wanting to take ballet. She dances around constantly and acts just like Angelina much so that I have been worried that she would be disappointed in a "real" class. She was somewhat, hmmmm what is the word????? oh yeah BRATTY.....:) before we left, her tights were "botering me", did not want to wear her shoes, generally grumpy!! Well, thankfully that all changed when we walked into the studio. She loved it, came out of the room all smiles:)

ready to go.....

after class
all smiles:)

playing with Chris this afternoon,
she "taught" him how to ride the scooter
Julianne is in town for a wedding shower and her birthday:)

these cuties were in the field right next to me when I went on a run today!

they never ran sweet!

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Now Some Happy!

School started......yes, first time for me in a few years to have all kiddos in school again. As I drove off today it was reminiscent of taking all three of the bigs to preschool the first empty car......just me......I think I had been alone for about 10 minutes before I realized I did not even have the radio on.....and I LOVE listening to music, music snob and all that I am. I think I needed the quite, just to absorb it into my soul. All the kids are happy so that makes this Mom happy!

first day of 6th grade, seriously!!
Gardner was just doing that last year right???

I LOVE when Madeline loves big...
she grabbed him to hug him and he looked and me and gave me that sweet smile....

this child I love big!!

sitting with his class at convocation,
a new beginning
I'm so thankful for his school....
and thankful for his Daddy who works so hard for him to go there...!!!
first day of 1st grade!!

What a mess this one is!!!!
she was trying to stand on her tip toes to be "big"
first day of Junior Kindergarten
Lori, recognize the dress??? Her fave!!

oh my goodness, I love this one.....
Janie refused to take a picture on Monday so she got her "first day" today instead:)

                                              Now onto  an Iphone dump!!!
little farmers helping Daddy

my goodness she is too cute. this was the day we got her awesome news on her bladder/kidney function!

3rd lost tooth!!
the tooth fairy forgot or was too busy or was out of the country the first night!
she delivered well the next night!

this is what happens when your children play "library" with the books your decorator helped you place perfectly..... thankfully I'm not as into perfect as I was in my past life.....
plus I had taken a picture.....which helps A LOT

going to Ms Jana for haircuts:)

there was a day that Madeline refused to let anyone cut her hair until she met Ms Jana....
loving the teenager "look at the hand"!

dinner with friends for Courtney's bday!
Happy 39th Courtney!!

           Now onto more serious all may have been a little worried about me after the last post, but this is far more serious. You see my husband is a farmer.....he just plays a veterinarian in real life. He loves his farming....the planting.....planning.....just digging and using equipment. When he "retires" he will be a full time farmer is my guess......seeing as he will never be able to retire with all these kids (hey just a side note, did you know that the bible never uses the word retirement???) Anyway, he had just put up about 370 ears of corn in the freezer last Monday...
         Well, Saturday morning I went out to the freezer to get some waffles....and it was hot...and stunk. My heart sank, and I don't even like or eat his corn. I knew it would make Hank so sad:(
He has handled his loss well.....haha......a little grieving......I may have seen a few tears......I was even sad when I bought frozen corn for the first time in 6 years, seriously, 6 years since I have even bought it!! When I drove into the driveway I saw this:
its dead to me....
looks pretty old and gross too I may add!
There's always next years corn crop to look forward to!

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Fear and Dread....

It took a look at sweet Lauren's blog to bring my world into perspective again......

She posted this pic from my house in the midst of the chaos she helps me with...
She said "even when our world seems upside down, God keeps his promises"
spoken so simply and eloquently by this sweet 24 year old

my mother gave me this little sign and I keep it right by my sink to be a daily reminder.....
lately I have been so caught up in said chaos that I have lost sight of it....
I have lost sight that God made promises to me....

"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God
who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

I have been stuck in that fear and dread place for much of this summer......
I hesitate in sharing much info since Madeline is getting older and I feel a strong need to protect her...
A child like this can rip your heart in two in the intense way she moves me to love her and the intense way she can frustrate me in her loss of control...
all that to say it's been a little rough over here....
hence the quietness on the blog.......

As I am coming to terms with her long term "diagnosis" 
I feel fear and dread
As I deal with daily confrontations....
I feel fear and dread
When I see absolute joy on her face...
I feel fear and dread of what is to come later

I don't however fear and dread our God
I know this deep in my soul that He is good
that He loves me
that He loves Madeline more than I can even imagine
I only fear Him in a lovely way
I am choosing to hold on to that kind of fear.....

"Let all the earth fear the Lord,
Let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of Him!
Psalm 33:8